6 Types of People You’ll See at the ‘Free the Nipple’ Protest at Hampton Beach

Everyone is talking about the topless protest coming to this New Hampshire beach. We have some guesses on who we will see there.

The "Free the Nipple" movement is moving to Hampton Beach on Sunday for a rally to promote equality and body positivity. Some people are pissed off, and others are fully-behind this movement.

Personally, I don't mind if people go to the beach topless, bottomless or in a lobster costume. On the other hand, I understand that our society isn't completely ready since we sexualize breasts like they are going out of style. Any change being made with this movement will be slow and steady but, much like the fabled tortoise, will probably win the race.

Until then, will be seeing all kinds of people on Sunday and I figured it would be good to give protesters, naysayers and the general public a good idea of the people they will see.

6 Types of People You'll See at "Free the Nipple"

1. Passionate Protestors

Description: There will be a lot of people expressing their views for this cause on Sunday. There will surely be a lot skin showing and everyone should be prepared to accept that if they want to hit the beach. These guys and gals will have a lot to say and maybe, just maybe, people will listen to them. Their plan is to try and integrate with the rest of the people on the beach, but that will likely turn into more vocal protesting throughout the day.

How to spot them: They will most likely be topless and cheering in support of nipples everywhere. The male protesters will likely have tape or something on their nipples, which is going to hurt like hell when taken off.

2. Disapproving Prudes

Description: I am sure that many people will come to form a counter-protest to all of the reckless nudity on the beach. It is no secret that many people are unhappy with "Free the Nipple" and the fact that it is legal to be topless on the beach in New Hampshire. Expect a lot of angry shouting and signs decrying the movement.

How to spot them: They will probably be dressed quite modestly to avoid any cries of hypocrisy, and may have a bible or two in their hands to wave around. You can identify them by the disapproving looks in their eyes and the scowls on their lips.

3. Confused Reporters

Description: The protest has gained local and national attention from the media, which means a flood of journalists will be hitting Hampton Beach. They will be combing the beach looking for people to talk to, and trying to get good pictures. They will be seen awkwardly asking topless women if they can take their photo and trying to keep those eyes politely centered on their faces during interviews.

How to spot them: Print journalists are always easy to spot at events. They are usually stressed, tired, confused and hungry. You can spot them with their camera or notepad. The broadcast journalists will surely have a really fancy hairstyle, well-ironed outfit and a huge smile that masks an even bigger ego.

4. Protesting Posers

Description: Every major protest event usually has a few people who don't care about the cause, but really want attention. In this case, it might be girls who just want to show off or guys who want to pretend to support the movement and get dates. These are the people that try and hijack a cause and ride it into the ground.

How to spot them: These types of protesters are usually hard to spot, but if you look hard enough you can tell the difference. Look for an emptiness in their eyes as they proceed to take multiple selfies with the hashtag #makingadifference.

5. Creepers

Description: You know who these guys are. These are the guys who heard about a topless protest and got a little too excited for the wrong reasons. A group of people are fighting for a cause, but to them it is just a chance to get their creep on. They will surely be on the prowl and it is advised to avoid the creepers at all cost.

How to spot them: They will probably be wearing t-shirts with cartoon characters on them, cargo shorts and socks with sandals. Look out for expensive cameras around their necks and those shifty eyes.

6. People who don't care

Description: These are the people that will be going to the beach and really don't care either way about the issue of public nudity. They look just like you and me and will just be using the beach like it was any other day.

How to spot them: Look out for their apathetic faces as they continue to ignore the crazy whirlwind of opinions, media and everything else around them. They will likely be wearing the usual swimming trunks, bikinis and one-piece swimsuits. You will probably see a lot of them.